Information Related to "Getting to Know Others"
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If you want to learn practical ways to get to know guys and girls without getting serious too soon, we wrote this "how to" section with you in mind. Here are six points we've discovered to be helpful.
1. Use group activities as opportunities to meet and observe people.
Group activities make it easier to widen your circle of friends, interact with people without pressure and discover more about the friends you already have. These times also offer the benefit of allowing you to see how people interact with others. How they act around everyone else can give you valuable insight into their character and who they are as individuals.
2. Spend time getting to know many different people. Invest in solid friendships.
Get to know as many types of people as you can. This helps you see what qualities are important to you and which ones you'd like to avoid. Really take time and effort developing deep friendships. This will not only aid in possible romantic relationships later, but will help you learn to care for, interact with and solve conflicts with people in general.
3. When you are old enough, find ways to spend one-on-one time in public places with good friends.
To truly get to know someone, it's important to spend time with him or her both in a group and one-on-one. Both scenarios reveal different aspects of a person's character. Just make sure to pick a public, nonromantic setting for this time together or you may have the difficulty of struggling with feelings rising up before their time. Listen to the guidelines your parents have on when to start this.
4. Avoid a romantic attachment during times of trauma. Instead, allow your friends and God to help you.
As tempting as it can be to hand your heart over to someone who is there when times are rough, it's wise to wait and see how you feel after you are in better control of your emotions. There's nothing wrong with being supported by a friend, but be wary of committing too deeply to someone just because you enjoy the sense of comfort and closeness.
5. Pray for clear vision and the ability to see an individual as he or she really is.
No one knows a person better than his or her Creator. Be sure to come to God regularly, asking for the clear vision to see things as they truly are, without the veil of affection. Then, although difficult, you must accept what God shows you, whether or not it matches what you desire.
6. Put God first, and seek the company of others who do the same.
God is and always must be the foundation of a true, lasting friendship. Because He is constant and unchanging, any relationship that truly places Him at the center will likewise be unshakable.
If the other person is spiritually on target, he or she will support your relationship with God, not hinder it. It is a great blessing to share God's knowledge and the goal of becoming like Him with those around you. By keeping these things in mind, both of you can grow in your relationship with God—and each other!
We hope these points will be beneficial to your journey through the complicated maze of friendships and romance. Stay encouraged and persistent. We all make mistakes, but with some insight and God's help, we can take part in the blessings of godly relationships. VT
For more on this subject read The Dating Debate.
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