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That's What Friends Do By Lorelei Nettles Friendship is often shoved aside in our busy lives. We need to make special effort not to push out those we love.
y seven-year-old son and I headed out one Wednesday afternoon to stop at the bank and run some errands. Tuesday was our usual day to go, but this week we had been sidetracked by other things. As we pulled into the parking lot, I commented to my son that Sharon must have missed seeing him on Tuesday. Sharon is the bank's receptionist and she and my son have been sharing time every Tuesday for the past three years. They joke and tell tales from their lives. He brings her candies and cookies, and she saves Happy Meal toys for him and gives him candy suckers. This day, though, Sharon's chair was empty. "She must be at the post office," my son said. But when we stepped up to the window, the teller immediately addressed my son and told him Sharon was in the hospital. She had been having chest pains the day before. I turned to my son to tell him we would call the hospital later and see how she was doing. As we went about our errands, we drove past the hospital. "We should stop and see Sharon," said my son. I explained to him how it might not be a good idea to visit her now, as we wouldn't want to be a burden to her and her family. My answer was unacceptable to him, and he then told me, in no uncertain terms, that we should go because "that's what friends do!" I was surprised by his assertive response, so on our way back from our errand we stopped in at the hospital, bought a card and headed to Sharon's room. When we arrived at her room, her bed was empty. We were about to leave when we met up with her husband, Jack. Jack urged us to wait, so we pulled up a chair in her room. It seemed Jack was happy to see us. He had only met us once during a chance encounter at a restaurant, but Sharon had spoken to him of my son often. Within minutes a nurse entered the room and told Jack that Sharon needed more tests and wanted to see him. I stood up and told him we would call later, but he asked the nurse if we could see her too and was told we could. I wasn't sure this was a good idea, feeling more and more that we were invading on a woman whom we loved, but only spent minutes with each week.
Proverbs 18:24 states, "A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." How can we make and keep such friends if we never have time for them? I have discovered that as each year passes people draw farther and farther apart from each other, not even finding the time to pick up the phone for short conversations. This happens with friends and family alike. No one can find the time to stop for more then a quick hello. Many times they can't even find time when a friend is in need. Maybe people you know are ill or are having bad times and really need the comfort of a friend, but no one has the time. Granted, many occasions exist when people need some space and privacy and deserve to be a little selfish with their time, but this should be short-lived. Proverbs 27:10 speaks of not forsaking friends and Proverbs 27:17 says a man sharpens the countenance of his friend. Again, how can we do this if we are too busy to even stop for a chat?
I've had many times in my life when I wished to reach out to a friend and found that they were just too busy. Their calendars did not allow any time for outside unscheduled events. It has become a burden for us to listen to other people's woes or to share a laugh or two. I believe we're not doing ourselves any favors. We are missing some of the joy in life. God knew Adam could not be alone and created Eve. We need people in our lives and especially those of like mind. People we can share our most joyous moments with, as well as our worst fears. Someone to back us up when needed or be there to hold our hand during bad times. Having someone with a pair of sturdy shoulders to cry on. Someone with whom you can fall on the floor in the thralls of laughter and hug hysterically when feeling overjoyed.
You can tell when two people are close friends, can't you? They chatter on and on, maybe finishing one another's sentences or laughing over an event without any words being spoken. We know these people take time out for one another. Of course, this is a close relationship and there are usually few of these in one's life, but even these friendships need to be nurtured. They can easily slip away if neglected. It's the newly formed friendships, the new acquaintances, (future friends?) and those who we see on a daily, weekly or monthly basis that need extra care. These are the relationships we most often take for granted. The ones we let slide as unimportant or not worth breaking our stride over. As we watch the world become ever more aggressive towards one another and we observe splits close to home--in our families and workplaces--it is difficult to stand back and see what is happening to ourselves. We should be drawing ever closer together and sharing our love for each other. Incidents happen that temporarily push us together, but we soon forget and get on with our usual lives. God has shown us and still shows us so much love. Jesus told us that we are to love one another. Being examples of the love God shows us should be a goal. We can be a friend or a foe. We can make time for others or brush them aside in our rush through life. But wouldn't you like to have someone insist on visiting you? Someone who would say, as my son did that day, "That's what friends do!" Copyright 2003 by United Church of God, an International Association All rights reserved. |
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Origin of article "That's What Friends Do"
Keywords: friends visiting supporting
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