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Vertical News: Too Many Friendships Can Make Us Introverted

article by Amanda Stiver

New research analyzes the ebb and flow of friendships and happiness.


Source: sxc.hu/bluegum

A study by Colby College in Maine has found that many friendships may make us happy, but over time they also can make us more introverted and withdrawn. Over 16,000 participants were tracked during a four year period and their personality traits recorded.

Those that started out highly social and happy, over time, became more withdrawn despite still being in the happiness category. Experts feel this suggests that when those that are extroverted reach a certain number of friendships, they stop trying to create new ones. These findings surprised the researchers; they expected increased happiness to automatically align with continued extroversion (Victoria Woollaston and Robin Yapp, “Got Loads of Friends? Then You’re Probably Unhappy: People Who Appear  Popular May Actually Be Withdrawn and Sad, Claims Study,” The Daily Mail at DailyMail.co.uk, February 18, 2014).

Friendship, by Proverbs

The book of Proverbs in the Bible is a vital resource for condensed wisdom and there are many proverbs that speak on the concept of friendship.

“A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother,” (Proverbs 18:24, NKJV, this and following references). Clearly, being sociable is the cure for a lack of friends, but truly close, mutually uplifting friendships are few and far between. It’s these friendships that we turn to during difficult times when we feel less extroverted.

“The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray,” (Proverbs 12:26). Having many social “connections” on Facebook or other social media has its purpose, but it’s important that our closest, most influential friendships are with people who fear and obey God.

Relying on quality rather than quantity is the healthiest dynamic for developing true friendships.

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