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The Worst Disease of Our Time
By Rex Sexton

"Of all the diseases I have known, loneliness is the worst." -- Mother Teresa

other Teresa saw people die from virtually every affliction known in the third world. In her hospitals she treated people suffering from malaria, leprosy, cancer, elephantiasis and a host of other terrible maladies. Before she died, Mother Teresa was asked, "What is the worst disease you have seen?"

Her response to the question was, "Of all the diseases I have known, loneliness is the worst."

In her book My Life for the Poor, she states: "I have come to realize more and more that the greatest disease and the greatest suffering is to be unwanted, unloved, uncared for, to be shunned by everybody, to be just nobody to no one."

"The greatest suffering is to be... nobody to no one" -- Mother Teresa
One of the most common results of our fast-paced, morals-free society is lonely people. Throwaways. Those who live alone with no one to care for or about them. Their families are either gone, uninterested or too busy. Every day is a repeat of coming home to an empty home or apartment and spending the evening in silence, except perhaps for the television.

Like any disease, loneliness can strike quickly and at any stage in life. It afflicts the rich and the poor, the young and the old. When it begins it seems endless.

In our fast-paced society where people are striving to acquire more things, they often find themselves with fewer meaningful relationships. A recent survey from the University of Chicago reveals some startling statistics about just how lonely today's urban adults can expect to be.

The survey, published in January, gave the results of several years of research and interviews of more than 2,100 Chicago area residents. According to the findings, the average urban dweller reaching adulthood can expect to spend 18.5 years of his or her life living with a spouse, 4.3 years living with someone they are not married to and the rest of his or her lifetime living alone.

Reasons given include higher divorce rates and growing reluctance of young adults to make a commitment to marriage. Researchers also found that cohabitation -- living together -- resulted in more jealousy and physical violence than found among married couples.

This is astounding when you think about it. Out of an average adult life of approximately 57 years (figuring that an average life span in the United States is close to 78 years currently), 39 of those will be spent lonely! This is an incredible change in the very fabric of our society -- one that is already having terrible consequences.

So what can we do if we find ourselves alone -- afflicted with what Mother Teresa said was "the worst disease"?

The Bible is full of stories of people who were closer than brothers because of their shared sense of purpose and belief in God.
First, we have to realize that our Creator understands and offers assistance. Jesus Christ spent much of His time with His disciples who rarely communicated on His level. When He became a man He shared the full range of our feelings and emotions. While loneliness is not sin, it is part of our frailness as humans and can lead to sin if we let it get the best of us.

Referring to Jesus, Hebrews 2:14 tells us, "Since the children have flesh and blood, he too shared in their humanity..." Verses 17-18 continue: "For this reason he had to be made like his brothers in every way... Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted" (New International Version).

"Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest," He said (Matthew 11:28). These are some of the most comforting words ever spoken. We are never truly lonely when we can pray.

Second, we need to build and develop family relationships. When God stated that "it is not good that man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18), He was also referring to the woman He was about to create. Our very nature is to need others and to need our Creator.

The message of the feminist movement and modern entertainment -- that marriage is unnecessary and, in fact, a burden that will prevent self-fulfillment -- is one of the most damaging lies ever told to a society. God says that children, even large families, are a blessing from Him (Psalm 127:3). The happiest senior citizens are often those who have raised many children and grandchildren.

Finally, develop close relationships with those who share the same spiritual values and sense of purpose in life. God says that He "sets the lonely in families" (Psalm 68:6, NIV). The Bible is full of stories of people who were closer than brothers because of their shared sense of purpose and belief in God. This is one of the primary benefits of assembling with a church family, which is something that we are commanded to do regularly (Hebrews 10:25).

God did not intend for us to be lonely. His intention for us was that each of us live a life filled with rewarding relationships -- the source of true happiness. He wants us to have loving and appreciative relationships with our family members, encouraging and positive relationships with friends of like mind, and an ever-deepening experience of learning from and getting to know our Creator and Savior, Jesus Christ.

For more about how to build relationships, read our free booklet .

Copyright 2004 by United Church of God, an International Association All rights reserved.


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