Information Related to "Take Time for Hospitality!"
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Take Time for Hospitality! By Becky Sweat There's more to the art of hospitality than hosting dinner parties. What does the Bible say about being hospitable, and how can you become a better host -- regardless of budget?
ospitality: \häs-pÉ™-ˈ:ta-lÉ™-tÄ"\ (noun) the act, practice or quality of receiving and entertaining strangers or guests in a friendly and generous way (Webster's Dictionary). That's the basic definition. Most of us would wholeheartedly agree that hospitality is a wonderful thing -- especially when we're on the receiving end of it. After all, who doesn't enjoy being invited over for a home-cooked dinner? But being the one bestowing the hospitality -- well, oftentimes that's easier said than done. Preparing a nice meal and getting your home "company ready" can take a lot of time -- something that is a scarce commodity these days. Maybe you think your house is too small or not nice enough to have guests over. You may be looking at your household budget and think you can barely afford to feed your immediate family, let alone host a dinner party. Or it could just be that the thought of hosting a get-together in your home completely stresses you out.
When we practice hospitality, we are modeling godly love, care and concern towards others. Many scriptures come to mind here, in particular Matthew 22:39, which instructs us to "love your neighbor as yourself," and Romans 12:10, which says we are to "Love one another with brotherly affection." Inviting others to our homes and sharing what we have with them is an ideal way to express this love. Now if you're not naturally the "hostess with the mostest," this can seem like a very tall order. Really, though, it's quite doable when you think beyond formal dinner parties and focus more on the actual meaning of the word "hospitality." To expand on the Webster's Dictionary definition stated above, hospitality, in its broadest sense, is a love of other people. It means giving your time, energy, talents and resources to encourage, support and strengthen others. This is done in an attitude and demeanor that makes those around you feel welcome, comfortable and appreciated. True, most people show their hospitality by hosting dinners in their homes. What typically comes to mind is the multiple-course meal served with the family's best china, crystal and silver. However, it doesn't have to be limited to that situation. The fact is, you can convey hospitality anywhere, anytime. It doesn't have to be in your home and it doesn't have to be for dinner. It also doesn't have to be an extravagant, formal event, nor do you need a perfectly spotless "showcase home" to have people over. Keeping this broad definition in mind, here are some ways to incorporate a little more hospitality into your life. Take advantage of low-cost and timesaving entertaining options
Convenience foods can also make entertaining easier. Pre-washed salad mixes, ready-to-grill marinated kabobs, ready-to-serve vegetable and dip trays, cooked rotisserie chickens, pasta salads from the deli, and brown 'n serve dinner rolls are all great time savers. You could also pick up some freshly baked rolls, pies or cakes from your local bakery. Your guests won't mind that you didn't do all the food preparation yourself. What matters most is that you make them feel welcome, not that you've invited them over for a gourmet dining experience. Become an advance planner While not all the get-togethers you host will be big, formal sit-down meals, probably some will. And those are really also quite doable -- if you plan ahead. It helps to create a preparation schedule (for what you need to do and when) for the weeks and days before, and the day of, a big event. This helps you organize your time and cuts down on stress.
Develop reliable menus Much of the stress of entertaining is wondering if the food is going to turn out or go over well. Once you've discovered some entrées that are easy to prepare and your guests really like them, stick with them. Don't think you have to find new recipes every time you have guests over. It's okay to serve the same menus again and again (especially if you are having different groups of people over, or if many months have passed since you served a particular entrée to certain guests). Your guests won't mind repeat menus, especially if the food is tasty. Don't try to do it all yourself Make entertaining a family activity. Women will oftentimes try to handle all the entertaining details themselves, but they shouldn't. Hospitality is something both women and men should be involved with. Remember, it is listed as a character attribute required for church leadership in Titus 1:7-8 and 1 Timothy 3:1-2. Wives should encourage their husbands to be actively involved in any get-togethers that are planned -- not only because it helps ease the workload, but because it is a vital aspect of our Christian calling.
You should also involve your children. Children as young as five or six can sweep floors, wash vegetables for a salad, make place cards, set the table, or do other tasks to get ready for company. Not only does this help you out, but you also teach your kids that hospitality is a normal part of home life. The more they do it, the more hospitality becomes second nature to them. Many years ago I started asking my son, who is now 15, to help me get ready for our dinner parties. By now he's done it so much that he's a really confident chef and host -- to the point that he's the one suggesting we invite people over after church. One other idea is to ask a friend or other couple to co-host a dinner with you. That way, you're not the only one doing the cooking, and some of your stress may dissipate. I have routinely hosted ladies' teas with another friend; we share all the baking, preparation and cleanup duties -- choosing one of our homes as the venue to host the party. We each invite half of the guests, which serves as a way for me to get to know new people (and vice versa), because my co-host might invite people I don't know well. Prepare for spur-of-the-moment entertainment opportunities Try to always have certain kinds of food items on hand -- bottled beverages, chips, jar salsas and dips, etc. -- so you can be ready for spur-of-the-moment entertaining opportunities. Hamburger patties, hot dogs and buns are good to keep in your freezer, to be ready for a last-minute cookout.
Don't obsess about your home Obviously you should try to tidy up your home before company arrives, but don't think it has to be in "show home" condition before you have people over. If you do, you may never feel ready to have people over. Your guests won't care if your furniture isn't dusted, kids' toys are scattered in the family room, or that you still haven't gotten those spots off the carpet or painted the kitchen walls. Just try to get your home as neat and clean as time allows. If it's far from perfect when guests arrive, don't go on and on apologizing to your guests. If you do, you'll only make them feel uncomfortable. Invite people who are truly in need True hospitality means not only extending ourselves to our friends and family, but also reaching out to people outside our social circle -- to entertain "strangers" as we're told in Hebrews 13:2. Luke 14:12-14 has a similar message -- that we should not just invite our friends over to our homes, but also the poor, the maimed, the lame and the blind. It is the same principle we read about in James 1:27, which states that "Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world" (New King James Version). Be on the lookout for people who are in need of a friend and have them over to your home. This could include new neighbors, new members of your church, recent widows or divorcees, or others who seem disconnected. When my husband and I plan a dinner party, we try to invite a few couples or individuals we know really well (people we know who are truly outgoing and interested in others) and then one or two couples or individuals we don't know that well. Giving to those who are lonely, disconnected, downtrodden or discouraged is certainly the heart and essence of true hospitality. You are not only providing them with physical sustenance, but even more importantly, connections with you and your family and your other guests. Involve all your guests in conversation As the host, you should try to include everyone at the table in conversation. Certainly all of your guests may not be familiar enough with every topic addressed to have something to add, but the bulk of the issues discussed should be of interest to most of the people present for the majority of the meal. Don't leave anyone out. If you're bringing together a diverse group of friends, or people who don't know each other that well, it might help to throw out a few conversation icebreakers. For instance, you could ask your guests what their plans are for the summer, how they got into their line of work, how they met their spouses, or if they have any travel stories they would like to share. It's a good idea to stay on top of current events (for many reasons, in addition to having good dinner conversation topics!), which everyone will probably be interested in talking about. Avoid discussing gossipy, negative or controversial topics; that would only lead to a negative interaction. You want the dinner conversation to be pleasant. Think outside the dinner table There's a whole lot more entertaining possibilities than just planning full meals in your home. Be creative. You could have people over for dessert and coffee or an hors d'oeuvres party (where your guests bring appetizers to share) rather than host a full meal. Or plan a snacks and cards or group games night. These types of get-togethers are usually easier to pull off than a full dinner.
Being hospitable could also include taking meals to new parents just home from the hospital, dropping off house-warming gourmet food gift baskets to new neighbors, or delivering portable food gifts like homemade jams, canned produce and fresh baked goods to anyone who needs a pick-me-up. I know people who make homemade soaps, dried flower arrangements and other crafts to give to others just because. For them, that's easier than having people over to their home. And that's fine. It's still hospitality. Now, if something you make flops -- whether it's delivered food or a meal in your home -- realize it happens to the best cooks. Don't let it dampen your good intentions. Remember, true hospitality isn't about being a gourmet chef. What matters most is that you're giving of yourself to others, showing a genuine interest in them and making them feel special. That's what hospitality is all about. Further reading: To learn more about the principles of leading a successful life with healthy relationships, request or download our free booklet, . Copyright 2010 by United Church of God, an International Association All rights reserved. |
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Keywords: hospitality entertaining guests fellowship
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